Ayrshire woman tells of suicidal experience

Dec 18 2009 by Lisa Boyle, Ayrshire Post (main ed)

I REACHED a point where I could see no way out. I felt the best thing for everyone around me would be if I committed suicide.

I got myself into a situation where I had an affair with someone. I couldn’t cope with it and I couldn’t bare the thought of it all emerging and I just wanted to be off this earth.

I was consumed with these thoughts all the time. I just couldn’t see any way out.

I have children and I could not see how their lives would be any good if I was still around. I felt the best thing would be if I was not here.

I just felt like life was over.

The turning point for me was discovering that there was hope. No matter what I had done, no matter how bad I thought things were. It wasn’t as bad as I’d built it up in my head to be.

My family would struggle more with the fact that I was in such an awful place rather than how much of a mess I’d made.

I can see now that it was the most awful thing I could have done. It would have hurt my family a million times more.

Now it would never enter my head. But the turning point has come over quite a long period. It’s come through talking to people and from God.

People get them into situations where they think it’s too big, they think they’ll never be able to fix it.

But suicide is never the answer.

I’m loving life again and I never thought that was possible.

If I’d done it I would have missed out on seeing how life can be transformed.